Sarita Buer (00:00)
Hello, beautiful soul and welcome back to Back to Here with Sarita, the new Manifesting Paradigm podcast. I'm your host, Sarita, Latina digital nomad, manifestation coach and guide for women who are done forcing, fixing and trying to manifest from burnout.
If you are ready for something softer, something real, something that actually honors your nervous system, this episode is definitely for you.
But before I get into all of that, I just wanted to provide you a short little life update. As you know that I am a digital nomad that's been living on the road now for the last six months.
I cannot believe that I left in May and now I'm almost at my six month mark of my nomadic lifestyle and now I have landed in St. Louis, Missouri.
And if you don't know me personally, or maybe you do know me personally, but I actually grew up in St. Louis and left about 20 some years ago to go live in Southern California.
And now I'm back after 10 years and I completely surprised my family, meaning I literally showed up at their front door to announce that I was here. They were in such a state of glee shock that it was so much fun to see their reactions.
And so I'm here in St. Louis until about mid November. So I really look forward to doing some nostalgic sightseeing. And as always, you can follow my adventures on both handles, Sarita Wellness and Life of Sarita, both on Facebook, Instagram, and TikTok.
Okay, let's dive into this episode because I know you are wanting to hear more about the paradox of force, especially when it comes to manifesting.
And believe me, I speak from personal experience when it comes to the paradox of force, especially since I started my nomadic journey six months ago, I have been learning so much more in real time that pushing and forcing actually blocks your manifestation. So I've come to the conclusion that forcing just does not work.
So let's go ahead and dive in. Let me start by asking you this first question. Have you ever felt like the harder you try to manifest something, like more money, more love, even more clarity, the further away it seems to get?
Like you're feeling like you're doing all the right things by saying affirmations, visualizing, writing your intentions down again and again, but for some reason something is just not shifting.
Well, I feel you because I used to do the exact same thing. I used to think that I just was not doing it hard enough, that I would need to try harder for some reason. I thought that if I was trying harder, that somehow my manifestation would come through. But what I've discovered is that try harder energy actually keeps most people stuck.
I personally have learned this through experience that trying to make more money or earn more love or even feel more at peace with myself actually brought me up against a wall.
And it's not your fault. It's not my fault. In our society, from a very, very young age, we have been taught that success, love, and abundance comes through pushing, through hustle, through discipline, through control.
But when it comes to manifestation, especially identity level manifestation, force is the exact thing that actually creates the resistance.
So let's talk about the subconscious mind and safety. Here's what's actually going on underneath the surface. And you know that I'm all about the nerdy science behind the subconscious mind.
The subconscious mind, the part of you that runs 95 % of your life is actually not logical at all. It's not tracking your vision board that you make or how many times you repeat, am rich.
The subconscious mind and its job is tracking safety, it's tracking familiarity, it's tracking the nervous system data that it's been fed. So when you're forcing affirmations like, I'm wealthy, while your body is in fight or flight, your subconscious is hearing wealth, but it's also hearing the word danger.
It could be thinking something to the effect of "something feels off, something feels unsafe" "Let's go back to what we know". And oftentimes that thought or belief or feeling of safety is coming from a place of trauma and an unhealed version of our subconscious, which is actually rooted in scarcity and self-doubt.
Because the subconscious familiarity equals safety and safety is the subconscious number one priority.
So let's look at what force looks like in real life. Let me paint you a picture, and this may sound familiar. I'm speaking from my own personal experience. You decide you're ready for overflow. You say affirmations, you create your vision board, you even visualize daily, but underneath the surface, you're feeling completely anxious. Maybe when you look at your bank account, you feel frustrated, you feel desperate for things to actually shift into that state of abundance.
You may be saying things like, I'm abundant, while actually secretly freaking out about money. You visualize your soulmate, for example, while actually panicking that you're running out of time to find them. And it suddenly feels like everything's up against you or the universe is just not listening to your truest desires.
But the actual truth is you're not manifesting from your actual words itself, intentionally manifesting, I should say. You're intentionally manifesting from your state. And that current state may be feeling like, I don't feel safe to be here.
And that's where the paradox of force comes in. And so what is that exactly? Well, if you were to Google it, in science, it essentially means an irresistible force encounters an immovable object.
In manifestation lingo and what we're talking about here is the more your conscious mind pushes, the more your subconscious mind resists.
Because your subconscious doesn't respond to control, it responds to ease. It doesn't need you to yell out your affirmations or say them with more force. It needs you to feel safe enough to actually believe them.
And this, this, this is what most manifestation teachings are missing. If you were to go on TikTok, if you were to go on YouTube, so many manifestation teachings try to override the subconscious with sheer willpower.
Let me put it into perspective for you. It's like trying to cajole a toddler out of a room when they're scared to come with you. It's like no matter what you say or give them, they just will not move unless they actually feel safe to go with you. Your subconscious mind is the exact same way.
And to share a little bit about my own personal experience with this, because that's what I love to do in this podcast. I'm not just about sharing all the education around manifestation and intentional manifesting and creating your dream life. I'm actually living it in real time and sharing with you my own personal experience. So how has this showed up in my life? Well, most recently, a lot.
Since I've become a nomad, the lesson has become so much more clear about force. I used to plan everything. I used to even try to force clarity. I would sit in my room and I would try to force myself to come to a clear conviction of something so I could move on to the next step. I used to control every step. But the lifestyle that I'm living right now just does not allow that.
Because I'm living a life that is not very structured yet I am retaining some level of structure. I've had to retrain my body and mind to trust like crazy, to let go of the grip, to allow it to be a lot easier for myself.
And I've come to the conclusion that this is true decolonized manifesting. This is true deconditioning from the matrix manifesting. Decolonizing, deconditioning from the need to hustle, to prove, force results.
Because I've been living this and experiencing this in real time, I've come to the conclusion that this is what I essentially want to bring to my teachings more when it comes to my brand, Sarita Wellness, as a manifestation coach, is not to add more things to your to-do list, in fact. So let me clarify something. When I talk about ease,
A lot of people will automatically just race to being easy, and a lot of times people equate easy with laziness. However, ease, when it comes to regulating the nervous system and feeling safe, the feeling of ease is actually very radical. It's very revolutionary. It's trusting the process to stop white-knuckling your way through life.
So you may be asking, how the heck do we shift? Well, we begin with working with the subconscious mind instead of working against it.
If you are an affirmations girly, can say something to the effect of instead of forcing your affirmations, you can say something with the ease effect to say something like, I'm open to receiving. I'm open to becoming somebody who trusts money. I am open. I am safe being seen.
If you're more into visualizations, try doing more of the gentle visualizations. I used to sit there and try to force visualizations. So stop trying to strain to see everything in detail. Instead, allow it to be relaxed. Maybe get into like more of a daydreamy imagining what it feels like versus just what it actually looks like.
And the hardest one is letting go of the timeline. Release the urgency. This is something that I've had to really learn, especially with this nomadic lifestyle is really leaning into the trust.
Not doing, not coming from the energy of this has to happen by next month energy. Trust that your desires are real because they're already encoded within you.
And the secret sauce is what I've been sharing over the last two some years, especially in this podcast and through my teachings on social media, on my TikTok, my Instagram, and what I've been teaching with my one-in-one clients. The secret sauce is regulating their nervous system. Your body needs to feel safe to receive. And you can do this by doing subconscious work and your body will feel safe.
when your subconscious becomes open. Things like breath work or gentle movement, EFT tapping, hypnosis, whatever, helps you feel grounded in helping you manifest with ease.
So like I said, my teachings, what I'm sharing here in the podcast is not about adding more to do on your list. I'm actually supporting you in easing up on the conditioning that you have been taught from a very young age.
you and myself and the people that are choosing to actually become more woke and experience the life that they actually desire to create and to live who are into manifestation, who are into their spiritual journey. We are all deprogramming from a world that has told us that we have to force our way into worthiness.
I have learned this so heavily in the last five some years since I have gone from burnout, break up and bankruptcy and have been sharing this in my podcast numerous times that I have been working through this personal worthiness wound a lot.
I've discovered that worthiness is not earned. It's actually a remembered state. And the path of ease is not the easy way out. It's actually the aligned way in.
I know this was a very short and sweet episode, so I really hope that it resonated with you, and I would love for you to share it with somebody who needs this actual reminder that it gets to be done with ease.
And if you personally are ready to manifest with ease with a grounded nervous system and safety and soul truth, here are some ways in which I can support you in that.
Number one, I highly recommend if you are not already following me on social media, at my handle, SaritaWellness, that's on YouTube, that's on TikTok, that's on Facebook, that's on Instagram. And if you are ready to dive in to build a more abundant nervous system,
I highly suggest you go to my self-paced program, Activate Your Inner Wealth and Abundance, which is under $30, and you can get started there. You can increase your abundance in five days. Or if you're interested, you can DM me personally, and we can start working together one-on-one.
Thank you so much again for being here in this podcast. Again, make sure to share it with somebody that you know needs the support. And you can also tag me on social media by sharing it in your stories and letting me know what was the most activating thing that you heard today.
Take care and see you next time in the next episode. And as always, keep being the amazing you that you are.
